Thanksgiving pt 1: Dessert with Dysentery

I'm a wind bag so I'll do Thanksgiving in parts so maybe someone will read this shit instead of TLDRing it. 


As Thanksgiving just passed I feel it's only appropriate that I make my first real post about the feast I so lovingly prepared. So let me set the stage: there I was, sick with dysentery in my bullshit little kitchen. 
It's 2 in the morning when I make the desserts as is tradition at this point. The biggest difference between this year and previous ones is that I'd been battling a decently high grade fever most of the evening. At any rate a fever of 102.7 can't stop me from making marshmallows and pie:{DD


So that's what I did. 


I prepared a pretty standard mixed berry pie(plus black cherries): I tossed frozen berries in flour and sugar. About a cup of sugar and just enough flour to coat everything, then I dumped it all in a store bought pie crust(I don't have a food processor which seems to be the "fail safe" part of many pie crust recipes) and squeezed a lemon plus about a tsp and a half of vanilla extract(excellent quality cold pressed shit stolen from my far less ghetto girlfriend's house) all over. 
To top it all off I made a lattice top because it's purdy/a good way to make sure everybody is having a vent. No egg wash, at my girlfriend's very eloquent persuasion of "Fuck shiney pies". And I baked the shit out of it at I think 375, but I can't be sure as my oven's thermometer is off(moar on that later :DD). It took about an hour. I ended up serving it with vanilla whipped cream and a dusting of powdered sugar.


Pie number two, or the second pie, since pie number two makes it sound subordinate was a pumpkin pudding pie with a cinnamon graham cracker crust. It was the shit. I'll tell you how to make it 'cos I'm that nice. 


First find a graham cracker crust recipe. I don't care which one, the ingredients should be graham cracker crumbs and melted butter. Follow it. If you don't have a food processor make your girl/boyfriend, younger brother, gramma/other extraneous relative that's chilling for the holidays make the crumbs for you 'cos you're the goddamn chef and you have more important things to attend to (slave labor ftw). Press your shit into a pan and blind bake, that is V. important. I used cinnamon graham crackers. It was an excellent choice. 
Here's your more important thing M. Chef de Cuisine. It's time to make pumpkin pudding from scratch. I jacked the spooky ghost pumpkin pudding recipe from food network(which belongs to them, not me), but made my own adjustments, the recipe is:

1 package gelatin
 2 cups whole milk
1 cup sugar
6 large egg yolks *4 large egg yolks plus 2 whole eggs(This is crucial if you want your filling to be filling. Do not add extra gelatin, it will only result in rubbery filling)
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon *1 Tablespoon homemade pumpkin pie spice(cloves, all spice, cinnamon, nutmeg all ground up fresh in my coffee grinder. To clean up grind a piece of bread that's been torn up for a few seconds.)
1/4 teaspoon fine salt
*1 teaspoon vanilla
1 (15-ounce) can pure pumpkin puree(I eyeballed half a 28 oz can and think I added a little more than 15 oz, it was welcome.)


Bloom the gelatin by sprinkling it over a tablespoon of cold water. Make sure this is in a bowl large enough to accommodate all of your puddin'. Don't touch it, let it do it's thing. Turn your attention to setting up a double boiler. In the top of the double boiler mix everything except the pumpkin and vanilla together and cook until it coats the back of a spoon(10-12 mins). Add the vanilla at the last second on the heat and then add it to the gelatin stirring constantly to combine. After your gelatin is all groovy and distributed add your pumpkin and repeat. Pour this loveliness into your (blind baked!!!!) crust and refrigerate over night. You will have extra. Let it set up and eat it. It's good.

I served this with just plain sweetened whipped cream and praline pecans (pecans + 1 T heavy cream + brown sugar + 350 degree oven for some amount of time don'twalkawayb*tch) for some crunch. 


I also made marshmallows from scratch, but I took the recipe from someone else's blog and that person used Martha Stewart's recipe. Alton Brown's is pretty fail safe too. I forgot the salt and compensated by sprinkling pink Himalayan salt on top. 


There's more where that came from.